Here is a good thing for both the spouse left behind and the the marine deployed. It's called a "Rubbing Stone" or a "Worry Stone". Apparently there are a lot of kinds of "special" Worry Stones with spiritual implications, but I personally don't believe it so the purpose is some what different for me. Let me back up and give yo some background.
A few months into deployment my husband, Ben, told me about something he had heard from another buddy with him that he was going to do. His buddy told him of an American Indian story about when warriors left for a battle or a hunt. They would be gone for weeks or months at a time when hunting. So the warrior would pick out a stone and rub it every time they were missing there loved ones. They rubbed it so much that is would get a deep divot in it from there thumb rubbing it so much. And when they returned to there loved ones they would show them how deep the divot got on the stone. Showing them how often the warrior thought of them and missed them.
I researched this story and could only find and alternate one. It is from a book by: Marianna Dengler, called "The Worry Stone". This legend is about
a young woman's, Tokatu, husband, Akima, died on
their wedding day. Tokatu never remarried, and cried at her
husband's
gravesite each year on the anniversary of their marriage and of Akima's death. When Tokatu died an old woman, the women of the village buried her next to Akima. On his grave, they found small, smooth stones,Tears of Tokatu, and the Chumash came to believe that these stones had the power to ease people's troubles...
So the latter story is a little nicer for those of us in a deployed situation, but I thought I would give both examples.
Anyway, back to Ben, he told me the story about the Indian warrior
then he told me that he had picked out a stone. And every time he
missed me and was stressed he would grab the
stone and rub it or just hold it and think of me. When he came for R&R a few months ago he gave me that stone. It didn't have a divot in it
but it was very smooth. He told me it wasn't
that smooth when he picked it out, but it was now.
Now I have the stone. At first it just sat on my night stand, but about a month after R&R I was missing Ben extremely bad. So I grabbed his rubbing stone. I didn't some much rub is as much as I just held it. Something about the weight and the reality of the stone in my hand
made me calmer and feel closer to Ben. Ben told me that the stone he gave me literally held
his blood, sweat, and tears. Also it means a lot to because it is from the land where he is
deployed, Afghanistan, so I am holding many pieces of him with me. I honestly didn't think a
stone could comfort me but it does! When we get our home I plan to put the stone in a shadow box and and hang it in the house. I don't believe the stone has any spiritual and healing
powers what so ever, but it helps!
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| Me and my Rubbing Stone from Ben |
So take from this what you will. It may sound a little
strange and you may not want to try it! But we do crazy
things when we are going through deployments. This is
something you can try a little less crazy!
